It's much harder than one might think! I struggled with this a lot when I was a younger mom. I thought it was a good idea to 'keep 'em guessing' or 'on their toes' never knowing what angle I'm going to use next. I would waver over such things as petty as a piece of gum! "Can I have one?" "No." I'd say. "Why not?" Well, I wasn't sure. I didn't really have a good reason and really didn't think it through.
Then I came across the verse in Matthew 5:37 "But let your 'Yes' be 'Yes', and your 'No', 'No'. For whatever is more than these is from the evil one."
So I knew I had to get it straight and not allow Satan any more entertainment! It seemed like it was a couple of weeks where I would have to tell the children to wait a moment for a response, until I thought it through enough to give the right response with the right results. Now, since I've had LOTS of practice, it seems normal. And my kids have learned that when I answer something that's it, well at least in a perfect world!
Since our world isn't so perfect, sometimes a child will try to discuss and persway my vote in a different direction. I'm usually open to discussion if it's a new topic, but I'm on to the ones trying to sneak something by me! And sometimes I'm just wrong, didn't think it through, didn't weigh all the options, and took a wrong turn, it's okay to humbly ask your children for forgiveness! They are always so willing and quick to do so!
I always try to say yes if I can. I always look them in the eye. And if they are close enough I always like to put my arm around them, wrap my hands arounds their cute, pudgy cheeks. And smile! Even if they get a 'No!' they walk away knowing that it's the best answer for them because they are loved so much!
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