We have tried to show our kids that the greatest joy in life is obeying the scriptures. And if the scriptures say women should be keepers at home, then that's what we should do. Ironically, my OB told me that of all the women seen, the ones who are 'just wives and mothers' are the happiest of all women. The women who have jobs and take their kids to daycare are the ones who are unhappy, stressed and depressed and begging for anti depressant medication.
So we have purposefully tried to train our girls in areas where it would be helpful in being a keeper at home. Where if they had to make an income they could do it from home. They can sew, bake/cook, clean, play/teach music, crochet/crafts and make jewelry, and have a love for children and elderly. I'm almost fearful to say this because I in no way want to appear arrogant or prideful, but Megan (my oldest daughter) having a desire to be a wife and mother is one of the best compliments I have ever received! There are just not many girls out there desiring to be a keeper at home, a wife and mother. She even gets a lot of flack from other Christians of how she should aspire for something greater which I think is very sad. Where are the Titus 2 women in this world? Why aren't older women teaching younger women how to train their children so it's a joy to be with them all day? Why isn't anyone stepping along side these young brides and showing them how to truly love their husbands so they can have a happy, fulfilled marriage? Why are college and careers important if you want to have a family?
Ever been to the grocery store on a Saturday? It's full of working mothers and their out of control kids. Or they have chosen to leave their kids one more day and shop by themselves. These women are tired, stressed, and overwhelmed with daily life. The children are lacking in time, attention, correction, manners and guidance. Nobody is smiling. Unhappiness and discontent just oozes from them all. It breaks my heart!
We would not want our girls to work outside the home because of what the Bible says for one, and two, we just have not seen any good fruit come from that. In fact, most cases older girls who leave home to work are quickly swallowed up and devoured by the world. So we have no interest in that. Jeff has done a fantastic job of trying to meet our daughters' needs as well as their wants. They are not spoiled, and have a great appreciation for 2nd hand and the sales, but if one wants or needs material to make a dress for a new baby gift, or make a meal for a new mom, or something special, he's very quick to comply and really feels it's his responsibility to meet her needs until her husband takes over. It's wonderful to see our daughters so carefree and not weighed down or stressed by such pressures to conform, or pay bills. This also has helped them to be content with what's provided for her and she knows that her future husband may not have money for things such as material, so we've tried to instill a thankful heart for everything. Megan does have a job teaching piano lessons, but because she's no need to pay bills, she can use it as a ministry. She charges a minimal amount and it's a blessing not a burdensome job, and fills a couple of days a week.
For me, it was a huge adjustment from working full time, earning a paycheck to staying home with a new baby that is more demanding than entertaining. I didn't know how to be content and thankful and had great pressure from the world to have the 'things' others had. My position was looked down upon and frowned upon, and I was even pitied. At least until our children started to get older, evidence of God in our lives and the fruits of our labors started to show.
Working outside the home gives a sense of accomplishment and is rewarded with a paycheck that can't compare with staying at home. It always provides an 'out' when things get tough, instead of a dependence, trust, and appreciation for a husband that reinforces that bond of marriage. The option is always there, even if far in the back of ones mind that 'if I had to, I could leave and make it on my own'. But staying at home has rewards and blessings that are no where comparable to any job!
It's Megan's desire as well to stay under the authority and protection of her dad until that prince charming comes along. She has a purity ring with her dad's birthstone in it, which I just love! I can't say that this is something we have really hammered into her brain since she was young, but she has read a lot of really good books on this subject, and just studying the Bible herself. She has also known a few girls who have made some really bad decisions in their own life. When issues come up or I'm discipling someone, we walk them through the consequences of worldly decisions. We try to help them understand the consequences of sin without having to be tempted by it or live through it.
The hard part in all of this is that it usually comes back to me, how close my walk is to my talk. My attitude and my desire to serve, and the level of my selfishness is usually noticed by everyone. I'm very grateful for the joy that God has given me in being just a keeper at home! Contentment is not common in women, let alone joy, but I have found it in obedience to His Word.
It's been frustrating to us why churches/women don't encourage women/young ladies to be keepers at home like in Titus 2. It's very sad and very hard to go against the grain, but we have to do what the Lord leads through His Word and our husbands, as we are only accountable to God and will stand before Him giving account of our own lives. No regrets!
So we have purposefully tried to train our girls in areas where it would be helpful in being a keeper at home. Where if they had to make an income they could do it from home. They can sew, bake/cook, clean, play/teach music, crochet/crafts and make jewelry, and have a love for children and elderly. I'm almost fearful to say this because I in no way want to appear arrogant or prideful, but Megan (my oldest daughter) having a desire to be a wife and mother is one of the best compliments I have ever received! There are just not many girls out there desiring to be a keeper at home, a wife and mother. She even gets a lot of flack from other Christians of how she should aspire for something greater which I think is very sad. Where are the Titus 2 women in this world? Why aren't older women teaching younger women how to train their children so it's a joy to be with them all day? Why isn't anyone stepping along side these young brides and showing them how to truly love their husbands so they can have a happy, fulfilled marriage? Why are college and careers important if you want to have a family?
Ever been to the grocery store on a Saturday? It's full of working mothers and their out of control kids. Or they have chosen to leave their kids one more day and shop by themselves. These women are tired, stressed, and overwhelmed with daily life. The children are lacking in time, attention, correction, manners and guidance. Nobody is smiling. Unhappiness and discontent just oozes from them all. It breaks my heart!
We would not want our girls to work outside the home because of what the Bible says for one, and two, we just have not seen any good fruit come from that. In fact, most cases older girls who leave home to work are quickly swallowed up and devoured by the world. So we have no interest in that. Jeff has done a fantastic job of trying to meet our daughters' needs as well as their wants. They are not spoiled, and have a great appreciation for 2nd hand and the sales, but if one wants or needs material to make a dress for a new baby gift, or make a meal for a new mom, or something special, he's very quick to comply and really feels it's his responsibility to meet her needs until her husband takes over. It's wonderful to see our daughters so carefree and not weighed down or stressed by such pressures to conform, or pay bills. This also has helped them to be content with what's provided for her and she knows that her future husband may not have money for things such as material, so we've tried to instill a thankful heart for everything. Megan does have a job teaching piano lessons, but because she's no need to pay bills, she can use it as a ministry. She charges a minimal amount and it's a blessing not a burdensome job, and fills a couple of days a week.
For me, it was a huge adjustment from working full time, earning a paycheck to staying home with a new baby that is more demanding than entertaining. I didn't know how to be content and thankful and had great pressure from the world to have the 'things' others had. My position was looked down upon and frowned upon, and I was even pitied. At least until our children started to get older, evidence of God in our lives and the fruits of our labors started to show.
Working outside the home gives a sense of accomplishment and is rewarded with a paycheck that can't compare with staying at home. It always provides an 'out' when things get tough, instead of a dependence, trust, and appreciation for a husband that reinforces that bond of marriage. The option is always there, even if far in the back of ones mind that 'if I had to, I could leave and make it on my own'. But staying at home has rewards and blessings that are no where comparable to any job!
It's Megan's desire as well to stay under the authority and protection of her dad until that prince charming comes along. She has a purity ring with her dad's birthstone in it, which I just love! I can't say that this is something we have really hammered into her brain since she was young, but she has read a lot of really good books on this subject, and just studying the Bible herself. She has also known a few girls who have made some really bad decisions in their own life. When issues come up or I'm discipling someone, we walk them through the consequences of worldly decisions. We try to help them understand the consequences of sin without having to be tempted by it or live through it.
The hard part in all of this is that it usually comes back to me, how close my walk is to my talk. My attitude and my desire to serve, and the level of my selfishness is usually noticed by everyone. I'm very grateful for the joy that God has given me in being just a keeper at home! Contentment is not common in women, let alone joy, but I have found it in obedience to His Word.
It's been frustrating to us why churches/women don't encourage women/young ladies to be keepers at home like in Titus 2. It's very sad and very hard to go against the grain, but we have to do what the Lord leads through His Word and our husbands, as we are only accountable to God and will stand before Him giving account of our own lives. No regrets!
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