10 Steps to Spanking

We have the set standard that when Jeff is around, he is the one to spank. And when he's not, it's up to me. I think this has worked wonderfully because it really shows that he is the leader, yet completely supportive of me. So even if an offense was against me I will tell them to go tell Dad you need a spanking. Then the offender will come back to me to apologize. Then when he is gone I 'help' him. So I'm not the one always spanking, leading and correcting.

We use a craft glue stick for a rod. It's flexible but provides a sting. Plus it can be easily transported! ;-) The consequences have to be greater than the desire to sin. God designed us to avoid pain. At times when I find that I'm spanking for the same thing over and over, it's usually because they have too much added protection (diaper or thick clothing), or I'm not spanking hard enough.

We will give a warning with each new dawn for the little ones. After that they get a swat for every year they are old up to 10. Our thought on that is as they get older they should be getting wiser. If they need to be spanked for the same thing, I will add extra for each 'reminder', for each time we have to go through the process.

Children should take responsibility for their actions and recieve consequences graciously. If there is ever any struggle or defiance on assuming a position then it will add to the number of swats. I in no way want to wrestle or struggle. The only reason I am administering this is because God commands me to do so. If I don't than I'm not obeying God! And I will share this with our children as well. We make it clear that it was their decision to disobey, and there are always consequences to our actions.

We feel that immediate obedience is God's standard. (Examples of Jonah) Obeying right away happily and completely. We have found that it is also a huge safety issue, if they are ready to do something that will harm them, we don't want to yell "Stop!" three different times before they obey. Now you know that after spending any amount of time with our kids that this isn't always the case. But it's our goal, and something we daily strive for. At some seasons we feel like we really have to crack down and stalk them to correct any little thing, then others where we can rest in our efforts and enjoy the blessings of kids that are wonderful to be around.

We send them to a private room so we can humble them not humiliate them, and there we go through these 10 steps:
10 Steps to Spanking


· (1) Immediately send them to privacy
· (2) Take a few moments to pray and calm down
· (3) Time of discussion. Child must be brought to confession of sin. Why are we here?
· (4) Exhibit emotional response: sin causes grief, not anger. (James 1:20 The anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God) “I am so sorry you made this decision to sin”
· (5) “What does the Bible say that I need to do now?” Proverbs 19:18, 20:30, 22:15, 23:13, 26:3, 29:15,17
· (6) Assume position for receiving payment of sin. Chasten privately so that they suffer physically, but are not humiliated.
· (7) Pray together, asking God to purify hearts and help make better choices in the future, apply scripture to sin..
· (8) Hug until they let go first.
· (9) Make restitution (clean up mess) seek forgiveness to all involved.
· (10) Repeat as necessary and pray some more!


Proverbs 12:1 Whoso loveth instruction loveth knowledge: but he that hateth reproof is brutish (stupid).

Proverbs 13:1 A wise son heareth his father’s instruction: but a scorner (scoffer) heareth not (does not listen or heed) rebuke.

Proverbs 15:5 A fool desiseth his father’s instruction; but he that regardeth reproof is prudent.

Proverbs 15:10 Correction is grievous unto him that forsaketh the way; and he that hateth reproof shall die.

Proberbs 15:32 He that refuseth instruction despiseth his own soul: but he that heareth reproof getteth understanding.

Proverbs 19:18 Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.

Proverbs 20:30 The blueness of a wound (blows that wound) cleanseth away evil: so do stripes the inward parts of the belly.

Proverbs 22:15 Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.

Proverbs 23:13 Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.

Proverbs 26:3 A whip for the horse, a bridle for the ass, and a rod for the fool’s back.

Proverbs 29:15 The rod an dreproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.

Proverbs 29:17 Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he shall give delight unto thy soul.

Deuteronomy 6:5-9 and thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart:
And thou shalt teach them diligently unto they children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.
And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes.
And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates.

This was adapted from a sermon from Reb Bradley.  It is comforting and calming to know just what to do next, have a plan to follow. It keeps all the emotion out of it and lets you take care of business!